Posted Nov-04-2017 4:06 PM
Don't @ me if you like it. You enjoy this film, I'm not gonna stop you. But good luck getting me to change my opinion. Without further ado, let's get into why Jurassic World actually sucks...in my opinion.
First off, the characters. They were bland and dislikable *looks at Zach and Gray.* I wouldn't have given a shit if any of them died, because I had no investment in any of these horrible characters. The only one who was even remotely interesting was Dr. Wu, but he was barely in the movie.
I also have a gripe with the story. How could anyone get sick of dinosaurs? I was fine with the Indominus rex, but there is no way people would get tired of seeing dinosaurs. Zoos seem to be doing fine even though they've been around for years, so why would people get tired of dinosaurs?
Then there's the subplots. The divorce between Zach and Gray's parents is completely irrelevant and only makes the film more bloated. Nobody gives a shit about Owen and Claire's failed relationship. Worst of all, there's the militarised dinosaurs bullshit. Dinosaurs would get slaughtered in the Middle East, so why send them into battle? The whole concept was just stupid anyway.
The special effects are garbage and nothing compared to the ground breaking effects of the first movie. Jurassic World, or Jurassic Whore, as I will refer to it from now on, is also severely overrated. People say it's on par with and even better than Jurassic Park. While they're entitled to their own opinions, I personally think the movie's strong points (which it has none, except the last fight) are exaggerated beyond shit.
The worst thing about this mindless f*ckery of a product was my personal experience with it. I first liked it upon inital release, and it led to my obsession with the franchise. But I was teased for liking it, because of my obsession. Because of a single movie that revived a movie series. The harassment I got for liking the film led to the worst part of my life, a stage in which I hated basically everything. You know what I'm talking about if you saw me in late 2016.
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